OMG!!! Has It Been This Long???

So just a quick update because that's all I have time for. Happy pills stopped working after a while. Not sure why, but things have gotten worse. I started therapy which has made some things better (I clean less!!!). But it has opened up some old wounds so some things have gotten worse. So doctor upped my happy pills dose and now things are happier again. I am calmer, enjoying my children more and such. Maybe it was all because of summer, having both boys home. It's been fun, but also quite challenging. Some days they are perfect little angels. Some days it's hard to keep them from killing each other.

This is typical one would say of all homes with kids so close in age. But what a "normal" mother can handle without losing her sanity, I cannot. So the higher dose of the happy pills has come to my rescue and things are better again. Not perfect, but much better.

Some people think it's all about the attitude. Some people think if one has a positive attitude, everything falls into place. I wish it were that easy. I really wish. I have a very positive attitude. I wake up every morning and write down all the things I am thankful for, and I have plenty to be thankful for. And then life happens. And whereas a "normal" mom can handle life, I need a little extra help. I used to feel very guilty about that, but now I'm perfectly ok with it. I'm ok with not being perfect. There, I said it!!! It's ok.

Summer has been insanely busy with the boys. Liam loves the pool. Aiden not so much yet but we'll get him there. It's been extremely hot, so much so that on some days it's even too hot to go to the pool. Aiden just pretty much got potty trained (minus nap and night time). I am oh so proud of my little man. They are both such amazing boys. Sometimes I wonder how I got so lucky. And well, sometimes I wonder if they are possessed by the devil...

I'm looking forward to both of them being in the same preschool in the fall. I am hoping to get some consulting work in the fall and get some of me back.

And I have started looking into graduate school again. My dream. I am hoping I will find a way to make my dream happen.

That's all for now. Hopefully less time will go by before I get a chance to post another update.

Yael