And the Allergy Saga Continues

So we got baby Aiden tested for allergies yesterday. For those of you who are just starting to read about our lives, you should know that Liam has life threatening allergies to peanuts and sesame to the level that he should not be touched by someone who ate anything with nuts and sesame and has not washed his hands and brushed his teeth before touching him. Those allergies make life very difficult when purchasing groceries and when being anywhere outside of home where it is safe for him. Any tiny mistake can result in the loss of his life.

So for baby Aiden there are some good and bad news. The good news is that none of his allergies are as life threatening as Liam's. The bad news is that is allergic to 18 things thus far. We have only tested him for 22 things because there's just so much you can do at one time on such a young baby.

So he is level 2 (Liam's allergies are level 4 which is the highest) for salmon, tuna, cow's milk and goat's milk. That means I can't have any of those in anything for at least 4 months and then I can try to add one thing at a time in very small quantities and document any reactions.

His level 1 allergies are for beef, eggs, apples, avocado, barley, corn (which is in everything), oats (meaning he can't have cheerios), rice, mustard, peanuts, and soy. That means I have no milk source other than coconut milk which tastes nasty to me. For all of these I have to be on a small-quantity, rotation diet. So I can have some rice once a week, 1 egg per week, and so on and so forth and document the reactions.

I have to keep a food log of everything I eat and everything the baby eats (he is starting solid foods). He will also have to be on a rotation diet. I have to document every strange poop or new eczema or anything that is out of the ordinary.

Not really sure what kind of milk other than my own milk I'll ever be able to put him on. The options out there are goat's milk, rice milk, almond milk and soy milk. We haven't tested him for almonds but since we can't have anything with almonds in the house because of Liam that's not an option even if he is not allergic to it. And he is allergic to the rest of them.

I went grocery shopping today and it took so long to read all the labels for all the additional stuff to nuts and sesame. It was difficult and exhausting.

It is very frustrating to open the fridge and pantry and know that there's very little that I can eat. And what I can eat today I can't eat more than once per week.

I am mostly scared of the things we have not tested him for yet. I hope nothing is going to be a level 4. To be constantly afraid for the life of one child is enough to live with and we hope to at least not have to be constantly afraid for Aiden's life as well

I am currently overwhelmed and a little bit depressed. I'm supposed to have a healthy diet because I am breastfeeding yet I can't have the things that are the healthiest for me.

Ok, I am done venting. I just need to take the time to process this and get used to this and not to starve in the meantime.

Random Thoughts

I was planning on writing some about how much I appreciate my husband and glad to have one that helps with the kids and all. I know too many moms who have to do it all on their own and I couldn't even imagine having to do that. It would be so physically draining and emotionally, well, I don't even want to go there. But tonight I'm a bit pissed off at him... I have some sort of a stomach virus so I am not at my best. I didn't get much sleep last night between being in the bathroom and nursing the baby.

This morning we had Liam's first Gymnastics Extravaganza! Let me explain...

I signed Liam up for extra classes at his day-care for gym and music. Thought it would be good for him to expend some of that endless energy he has in a gym class and music is something ALL kids just LOVE. Well, he has been taking this gym class since February or March I think and today they had a show at our town's cultural center. We had no way of knowing if he was going go clam up and be all shy or be a star performer. Turns out he was a star performer. Whereas all the other kids were attached to either mommy or daddy and not at all happy about performing in front of an audience, our little (or should I say BIG) boy Liam was loving all the attention and being in the spot light. Pictures and videos will be on his blog once they are done uploading (link to the right). I have to admit it was really emotional and wonderful to see my baby be so confident and sure of himself and having no trouble being in the spot light, especially since I hate being in the spot light and I freeze when I have to speak in front of an audience. He made us really proud.

After that we got home and I put the baby down for a much needed nap seeing how he missed his morning nap because he was so excited about watching his big brother perform. After that I had to put Liam down for a nap. Maybe now someone who is reading this is wondering why daddy isn't putting one of the kids down for a nap. I wonder that myself sometimes. I seem to do so much more. The baby won't really calm down enough for anyone other than me and sometimes for his babysitter Lindsay. It probably has something to do with the fact that he gets to nurse before nap or bedtime. And Liam just doesn't take daddy seriously enough when daddy says no more reading or talking or whatever it is that Liam does when it's time to go to sleep. I think Scott doesn't get the whole being firm but kind thing that I do. I don't feel Liam ever feels like I'm the bad cop - I just do as I say and he knows I mean it. Anyways, I got to take a short nap with the baby later in the afternoon which was nice but then my stomach virus hit me again. So you would think that if mommy is so sick and has a 2.5 year old and a 4.5 months old to take care of, that daddy would decide that going away for the night is not such a great idea. Scott had a surprise birthday party for a childhood friend in Northern Virginia to go to tonight. He gets to go and have fun, spend the night at a hotel with two childhood friends and drink and have a great time while VERY sick mommy gets to stay at home with two kids who don't sleep through the night. You would think that it would occur to him that going away isn't the greatest idea. But NO! He thought I would get through it ok I guess. You see, I know exactly what was going through his mind. He probably thought that because I was walking around and getting stuff done that I was not that sick. He doesn't get that mommies just keep on going because we have no other choice. When he gets sick he gets in bed and doesn't really come out until he gets better. When I get sick I keep on going because I have a husband and two very young children who depend on me. So in his mind he isn't doing anything that bad by leaving me home alone for the night with them. In my mind, well, let's just say I am beyond angry.

So the sitter who helped me through bath and bed times left and I am here, writing this in between sprints to the bathroom. I am praying really hard that both boys will cooperate and will sleep well. I am praying that Liam won't wake up when the baby is nursing. I am praying that the baby won't wake up to eat while I'm in the bathroom and can't get to him. I am just praying for this night to go ok. And I plan on taking a really long shower and nap tomorrow when Scott gets home. But I also know myself and know that I won't let myself rest because there's always so much that needs to get done.

So I was planning on writing a really positive post with how blessed I am and how much I appreciate having a husband who helps a lot, but I'm too darn mad to do that so it will have to wait for another day.